Afterthoughts

beneath the jagged waves my face silently slips moonlight accents edge peaks and valleys and I’m no longer fighting it releasing my final breath I’m floating softly in this cold new world sinking down into the vast depths I look above to see the gentle beams reflections of some far off light sifting through the […]

Erosion

I hold memories of you like a wave-worn rock nestled in my pocket reaching in, my fingers float along your soft edges /the gentle curves of who you were /who I remember you to be /who we once were I feel your weight a whispering touch, I cradle that ache again /the fervent ache to […]

Just This Once

I’m digging deep. Trying, hoping to become what I think you want me to be. I’m holding tight. Gasping, desperate to breathe. Daring myself to become more. I’m reaching, stretching begging for your hand. More than just an idea or an artist or a passing fancy. I’m digging deep. Spreading myself thin. Reckless almost. Frantic […]

Ten Years

Ten years. Damn. It doesn’t feel like ten years. My body remembers. Remembers like it was a few months ago. My chest remembers. The ache. The brokenness. The questions. The tears… oh god, the tears. Somehow it was my fault, I’m sure of it. I’ll never forgive myself. I don’t expect anyone else to either. […]

Grief Held

The loss was so profound So deep So all-encompassing that it Seemed For a time As if the tears would Never End “Will I ever stop crying?” I asked the world in general In poured the platitudes The endearments The empty gestures And then she spoke up from the midst “Never. You’ll never stop crying.” […]

Then and Now

your nails, like claws dragging scratching ripping through. my. brain. tearing out every hidden part of me you see all the deepest bits of me digging in, your fingers leave behind furrows and trails bloody bits and me, I stare wide-eyed drool dripping down a foam-flecked chin I was impenetrable I was strong I was […]

Bloom on the Inside

Weeping My bark, dry Soaks the tears A blotter for future days You’ll never know Just what you do to me My response Powerful I remain internal Showing my hand Was a mistake I won’t repeat Thirsty My roots, searching Stretch out Spreading and hungry Always needing more You don’t know me The real me […]

Knowing Me (astral alignment)

Knowing me, as I do This won’t happen There’s no special alignment Of stars or planets for me For I am Worthless, apparently Not worth a little time or energy Always I try To make the right decisions But they always seem to be Poor in the end I’m haunted By sin and regret Just […]

Atrophy

tender and rare blue flower the forget-me-not is fading no longer vibrant and bold no longer delicate and precious the vase sits a water-ring along its lip just one in amongst the others your hand lifts them out tosses them away no second glance replaced by an energetic lily instead her perfume is heady delicate […]

words/ REBLOG

i need words so old they are new the ones i have are abused and confused and quite often misused i need a word in the language of rain sunlight green in the grey pouring though to the ground and that sound pounding, pummeling wet the pavement in spring a secret told by the wind […]