White Spaces

it hurts like claws digging in
the betrayal
the wickedness
vicious claws tearing, gripping
never letting go

it wasn’t just the words
it was what lay between the words
lies lies lies!
and I never saw it coming
never thought it possible

how you held my heart in the one hand
and her face in the other
callously carelessly indifferent
as long as you felt good
we meant nothing in the end
her and I

claws crushing, macerating
my heart bruised and swollen
tears unstopping
throat raw then numb
left and cold, devoid of flavor
unrepentantly empty

a shell.

how could you?
I am a woman! flawed, yes
but a woman
loving readily, deeply, intensely
needing but loyalty and respect
love in return

I remember.
I will never forget.


tara caribou | ©2022

40 Comments on “White Spaces

  1. This must have been a difficult write, Tara. Betrayal is such a heartless (and emotionless) action, and, as you do rightly point out, its not the words but the spaces which kill.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Such a powerful poem…you’ve expressed it beautifully…would love to listen to spoken word of this piece if you one day create, Tara 💫

    Liked by 1 person

    • Great idea, Navin. I haven’t done spoken word in a long time, since I got banned from SoundCloud. I suppose I should see what other options are out there for me.

      Liked by 1 person

        • I didn’t know I was breaking one of their rules. You’d think they would say remove the content, like a warning first… nope. I get an email from them saying I was breaking their rule, they deleted my content and my account, and that I was never allowed to use their site again, for life. I honestly had no idea I was breaking a rule, or I wouldn’t have posted certain stuff on their. 🤷🏼‍♀️ I found out someone who shall remain unnamed (yes, I know who) turned my account in.

          Like

        • Sound Cloud is for REAL?????? You will think there is an appeal process, not just a complete wipe out. This cancelling culture bullying is unbelievable. Understandably if we broke a rule, we would need to know what for learning and prevention in the future. They just expect consumers read every fine print or have a lawyer on staff? Gees….

          Liked by 1 person

        • Yeah, I understand them giving me a warning… but no warning. Just a bummer. Especially because so many people use SC and now I am not allowed to listen to any of their stuff anymore. That’s probably the biggest thing for me. I have friends who release music on there only and now I can’t listen. 🤷🏼‍♀️ Oh well. Can’t change it.

          Like

      • Well, you can always record & insert the audio file in your WP post…or you can create a video file with words & voice or something like that…it would be nice to listen to your voice, Tara ✨

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Highly evocative and raw, Tara. I hesitate to ask what fueled the feelings, instead, I’ll enjoy the piece for what it is. Packed with meaning.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. This one hit HARD because … like you I always think a woman betraying another woman whether romantically or as friends or family or in work – seems somehow less natural than if a man does it and YET women betray one another more I would say than men do (each other or women). It’s a baffling phenomenon. You described it perfectly.

    Liked by 1 person

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