Why do I do this to myself? Why do I keep cutting open the wound? Reminding myself of all the ways I fail. That I don’t measure up. That I never will.
I want so much more than I will ever have. Why torture myself? Why can’t I leave well-enough, alone? There is this untouchable thing… I stare at it. Memorize it. I long for it. Desire it. I want more.
And still I know, this future isn’t for me. It never was. I made the mistake of wishing it could be true. But deep down, I know I lied to myself.
My destiny looks a little different. Why do I do this to myself? Because I want more.
tara caribou | ©2020