Even though I know what it does to my heart, still I lay here night after night and morning after morning and all I can think about is you. It’s the words you speak. The look in your eye. I think about our lips touching. How I want you to devour me. Inhale me. Consume me. I want to feel your fire spread when we touch. The rough feel of your hand as it smacks me hard or softly caresses. My own fire becoming liquid love coursing down my cheeks, down my thighs. I think about your voice, softly urgent in the moment, growling out instructions and praises. My own joining yours in crescendo morphing into sighs and shudders and panting. I imagine you gripping my hair, holding my face as you push yourself deep inside my wet warmth, our eyes locked, frozen in time, more intimate than any space of time shared previous. Deeply I fall into those dark murky pools, my blues peering into the depths of your browns. Layers upon layers. What do you see there? Do you see my love? Do you see my doubts? Do you see my fear and my pasts? Do you see my sins and my worries and my hidden thoughts and my lusts and my desires? I am in wonder that you don’t look away, trembling, at what you see within me. And so I lay here, my hand stretched out for you, remembering all those things you said to me. All those looks you cast my direction; I want to believe. To believe in Us. Yet, there you are, across the many miles that separate us and I’m here, barren and alone.

tara caribou | ©2017

16 thoughts on “Barren

  1. The longing is so palpable that the reader knows it comes from a deep place within you. Your questions are familiar and I hope, one day, you have all the answers and that they connect the hand reaching out to the one reaching back!

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      1. Ahhh, yes, I know how this is, my friend. However, when you write like this, it is not from a barren place, but from a depth of passion that has not found its true outlet. We can only relieve ourselves so much through writing – there are some things that can only be released in the presence of another. You are most welcome!

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        1. Interesting thoughts. Where I was viewing my internal (or not so internal now) musings as devoid of passion, and therefore barren, you view it as the complete opposite. Interesting that it should come off that way. Maybe there is deep passion within your own soul (and indeed there must be since I’ve read your works time and again) that is overlaying my own barrenness. A reflection, if you will, of your own passionate soul.
          Not sure if I’m conveying my thoughts very well but…. it’s an idea I have.

          Liked by 2 people

        2. Ah, yes, I think you are absolutely right. As i read your words, I felt the familiar longing I experienced before I fell in love. Even now, there are days when I want to leave all I know and cling to her, but for now, we have to enjoy what we have in the digital world. SO, there are days when I feel that longing. I guess the only difference is, she is always reaching back!

          Liked by 2 people

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